How much???

Now, undergarments is a topic I do not generally get into here at Jerusalem Revealed, but the following incident is something worth sharing. Please be forwarned, if you are sensitive to modesty issues, the following story may not be for you.

After having made some changes to my wedding gown, I found that the previously purchased supporting undergarment of choice (henceforth: Bra) was no longer sufficient for the style of dress I will be sporting. Ladies will understand this, men: scratch your heads in wonder and thank G-d this isn't your problem. Anyway, I went into a boutique on Emek Refaim street, one that is known for its personalized attention, wide selection and quality. I explained to the saleswoman (who, as you will see in a few moments should win the award for best saleswoman in Israel) what I was looking for, and she was very helpful, and brought me several candidates until I settled on a certain bra.

Then, grasping my body parts in her hands, she complimented my, ummmm, you-knows, and told me that a young bride should only wear beautiful brassieres and panties, in order to please her husband, so that he will desire her even after 25 years of marriage. She suggested I throw away every bra and underwear I owned that was not up to snuff, and get some really sexy, colorful items instead. I explained that, as my nursing uniform is white, colorful will not always do it for me but that I would be interested in seeing some "beautiful underthings to drive my husband mad". I mean, she told me I had "perfect titsies" [direct quote], so who am I not to house them in the "beautiful underthings"?

I tried on a few sets - and I must say, they really were lovely. So lovely, its a shame one cannot (unless one is a Spice Girl or Madonna) wear them on the outside of one's clothing.

I finally settled on 3 pairs of bra+panties, reasoning that Bryan certainly deserves the best. Now, of course when one is brought these items into the dressing room, there is no price tag on the items. And I consider it rude to ask the price. Not sure why, I just do. (Even though what's rude is not to put the price on the item). I figured they'd be pricey, but how much could such a set cost? Maybe 250-300 NIs at the most.

So, we head over to the cash register, and ring up the purchases. Bryan, like a true guy, has been waiting outside the shop this entire time (well over an hour). 3 sets of bra+panties. How much can it be?

Well, imagine my shock and horror when the total bill came to 2,817 NIS. No folks, that is not a typo, we're talking $700 for 3 pieces of miniscule silk and lace.

Now, if I had any common sense, I would have said, "Wow, that is way more than I planned on spending, thanks for the help, but I'll just take the one bra I came in for and be on my merry way". But I have no common sense (though plenty of guilt and remorse). So I handed over my credit card and paid an obscene sum of money.

As soon as I got outside, I said to Bryan, "Honey, I just spent way too much money". Bryan didn't want to know how much I'd spent. "No, honey," I said, "I think I better tell you - I just spent more than our monthly rent on 3 pairs of bra + panties."

Now it was Bryan's turn for shock and horror. God bless him, he said, "Wow, that is a huge amount of money, but if you really love them I guess its okay". So I told him, "No, this is definitely not OK. I won't enjoy wearing them. I'll remember how much they cost and I'll be afraid to put them on my body."

One of the pair of panties alone (and sadly, my favorite of the 3 pairs) cost 500 NIS. You know the phrase "farting through silk"? Well, this went way past that. Way past.

So I sat down, and told Bryan I think I need to return these items. I don't have the money to spend like that, and I will not enjoy the undergarments anymore. However, I told Bryan I was too embarrassed to go back to the store and return the stuff. Mostly, I didn't think she' take it back and give me a refund. The most I would get would be store credit. And that wasn't so helpful.

Bryan kept urging me to try to return the stuff, or to simply keep it and deal with it. Finally, my amazing, fabulous, incredible fiance said, "Would you like me to go return the stuff?" How'd he guess?

So off Bryan went, worried that the bra lady would think Bryan was the type of man to forcibly remove purchases from his fiancee's hand and return them against her will.

But within 10 minutes Bryan came walking back, hands empty save for my credit card and a return receipt. She'd actually refunded the money. I decided to keep the cheapest of the 3 sets (still over 600 NIS) as a memory of how patient Bryan is. Though something tells me I'll probably get to se that quality a thousand times over.

And ladies, if anyone even thinks of shopping at that boutique, leave your credit cards at home and bring some common sense instead.